^^That blows!


I HATE this paper! I can't get my head wrapped around it and I can't figure out how to make it a whole page! I don't like to beat around the bush, just get straight to the point and Ican't do that with these papers! oh, and then my english teacher assigns 3 papers today, I have 2 more plus this one for another class, 1 long one for archeaology and another one or 2 for my tibet clas....man, next quarter is going to suck!

^^B*stards!

Have a huge rant...but I'll post it later when I'm not at work.

I ended up having a really hard night last night. My mom and I got into a big fight and she made me feel stupid. It started off where I was just asking her about how to do takes. She doesn't listen and if she does let me talk she doesn't actually here what I have to say. So she started yelling that I always make her late for work and how I need to be more of an adult. I say she is the one always acting like a kid. She tells me maybe she should make me pay rent again. I say I can't afford it. She says I should get a better job. I get mad and yell since I can't find one and this is the only thing I can find. She hangs up on me. (part way into the fight she left for work and called me)

I tell matt. He comes over. I tell him I'm tired. He says he is going to go home then and I break down crying. He holds me. I go between telling him the story, smoking, and frantically crying for a while. I cry again. He trys to make me laugh. Then he says something that makes me upset so I smack him in the face. I stare at him not believing that I could actually do that to him. He turns away from me. I start crying in a corner because I can't stand myself for doing it. He is mad and walks in and out of the house hoping I'll come after him when I calm down. Eventually I get out of bed and just hold him until he leaves to take care of his dad.

After that I just felt like crap. I was very emotional. Any little thing could make me cry. My saliva was really thick like mucus so I had to keep spitting so I wouldn't choke. My throat felt tight. I tried drinking water. It felt like I had a hard ball of air stuck in my throat. I passed out and I couldn't go to class. I had problems with my throat until I got up at 6pm.

^^ What an awful night.

I would talk things out with Matt; let him know how you feel. As for Mom -- if she's anything like my mom, she's forgotten all of it by now, and probably didn't mean any of it anyway. That's frustrating, but it also means you probably won't have to rehash any of that with her (at least not all at once).

got a lump in my mouth, it was on the roof but its moved and this f**ker HURTS!! I'm taking antibiotics and painkillers but its not shrinking, it anything its grown when it moved... I cant even eat anything that isn't soup because when anything tougher hits it it shoots pain through my head that feels like its going to explode for a split second. I know a split second doesn't sound like a lot but thats every time I chew, its a meal of pain so its just soup, pudding, jello and if I get desperate, plain oatmeal I loath plain oatmeal...

I have a little reliefe in its moving and the growning and shrinking it did last night, at least now I know it can't be oral cancer since a tumor wouldn't move or be sort of squishy like this is... No clue what it is though and I'm contemplating stabbing it and squeezing out whatever it is BUT that would cause crazy levels of pain plus the human mouth is disgusting and it could get infected with somehting so I'm leaving it to do whatever its doing...

its mostly the thought of the pain stopping me from stabbing it, I mean just normal foods touching it hurts like crazy then stadding it I think would be some whole other level that I dont want to deal with

I did, they gave me pain killers and antibiotics, they arent making it shrink any yet... I just stabbed it a few times with a sewing needle and sqweezed a bunch of pus out zit style theres still a bunch more there but my tooth started hurting so I had to stop.

I hope you feel better soon.

So here's my work rant:
I work as a vocational counselor with people who have disabilities. I basically give them different tests/assessments to find out what their aptitudes, interests and abilities are, and then figure out what kind of work they can do. My client's disabilities include learning disabilities, mild mental retardation, Asperger's, mental illness, substance abuse and the like. Up until recently, the clients I've been getting were pretty much able to work despite their disabilities, but maybe needed training or other supports...the important thing is that were able to work.

However, lately I've been getting clients with more severe disabilities and I really don't know why they are in my program...I have one guy with moderate mental retardation who can't even talk, another dude with asperger's who doesn't respond to his own friggin' name, and this one chick who can't speak English, is illiterate in her own language (Spanish), and has so many damn physical issues she should be home collecting her SSI checks.

At what point did their brilliant counselors, case managers etc. think that it was a good idea to send these people to a my work program? What the hell am I supposed to do these people? They can't friggin' work!!!

Yeah, so that's been really really really pissing me off at work.

Just got home from taking her to the airport.

^^Aww well hopefully you will be able to tell us about while she was there soon and the good memories will make you feel a little better.

I have a weird headache.

I got the test results back from my doctor about the food poisoning today. Turns out I was infected with 5 different species of bacteria, one of which could potentially give me temprary paralysis. Scary! My stomach is back to normal and all but the looming potential threat of becoming unable to walk or use my limbs within the next couple of weeks scares the hell out of me!

I've pretty much just laid awake in bed for the last 24 hours or so, aside from some mild getting up to try and post stuff, and eat once.

I'm quite unhappy without her here. Even going anywhere to get food it's going to occour to me I'm only getting stuff for one person. :\

^ That's as sad as it is sweet!
I bet she misses you too. Even though I so know it's not the same,
at least you are back up on the comp and can talk.

Morwenna wrote:

I got the test results back from my doctor about the food poisoning today. Turns out I was infected with 5 different species of bacteria, one of which could potentially give me temprary paralysis. Scary! My stomach is back to normal and all but the looming potential threat of becoming unable to walk or use my limbs within the next couple of weeks scares the hell out of me!

5?! Dag Gone! That's crazy.

uhh... Well. Everyone in your group knows about this don't they? I'm 99% sure you'll be ok, but gee... man. Scary no doubt. I know you've got being extra careful on your check list now as to where & what you eat. It's disapointing to have to be that way with so many things to taste & try, but yeah.

0.- ..you keep us up dated too!
Don't go off MIA-ing and have us worried all to crap!

After doing some research I've learned that the chances of me getting paralyzed are pretty slim. Luckily for me food and water in Japan is pretty safe, and I don't plan on leaving this country again until I go back to America in the summer. I'm going to Kyoto next week so hopefully I'll stay healthy!

^^Well I'm glad you feel better. Just try to be safe.

Madelchai: I know you miss her. But think about how she feels so far away. Things will get better. And maybe soon she can either move with you or you can move over by her

Why cant some companies get things right? I ordered two packs of each of the girls' school photos (which are gorgeous by the way) at a total cost of £78. I wanted photos for family and friends. Received the photos - one each of them and one of them together

My Mother's Day ring arrived from Alchemy Gothic today. Was it the lovely vampire fang one I wanted? No it fecking wasnt, it was a horrible mens' signet ring featuring the bloody Wyvern dragon. I have nothing against the Wyvern dragon but it wasn't the ring I wanted.

Added to that, my Tesco home delivery substituted gammon for the chicken I had ordered. WTF?

I'd like to see what would happen if I moved people into the wrong house or got a court order for the wrong person!!!

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!

Crazy day Mrs. D.
I hope you get that stuff sorted out so that you get what you originally wanted.